The Bracelet Slinger Blog

It’s important not to take it personally if the person you are trying to support does not respond or accept your help. It probably has nothing to do with you. It could be that being nice was a tactic that their abuser used to reel them back in. It could be that they feel safer handling difficult situations alone due to past experiences. They might not even be aware that asking for help is difficult because it is linked to…

Knowing what to say to someone who is contemplating suicide can be uncomfortable. We want to make them feel better but we don’t always know what to say. One thing that can be helpful, instead of giving advice, is to remind them of their accomplishments, how important they are to you, or…

September is National Suicide Prevention Month. All month, mental health advocates, prevention organizations, survivors, allies, and community members unite to promote suicide prevention awareness.

suicidepreventionlifeline.org

According to research, most suicide deliberation lasts a duration of less than 5 minutes. While…

Paint with your emotions.  Not your eyes.  Not with what you see.  Not the surface.  But what’s underneath it all.  What you feel.  Where it all connects and pulls your heart out and onto the paper.  Put all your light and your darkness onto the page.  Run your brush through all your tears, all your screams, all the heartbreaks, the orgasms, the little anxieties and pint up frustrations, all the ghosts inside your mind, all the magical moments…

I’ve always been intimidated by drawing and painting aside from when I was a kid.  It just seemed like something that you had to study and have an eye for.  It seemed to come with a set of hard set rules laid down by academia and classical artists and snooty people.  And all that rigidity turned me off to it.  It’s funny how a little butterfly effect can set your mind spinning down a path without realizing how far from reality it’s gone.  I don’t know what exactly made me think that that’s what drawing and painting is, why I think of rich people drinking white wine in a big white room that all you hear are the whispers of critiques and clinking of expensive shoes on polished floors…

Since parting with the van, I haven’t been inspired to make bracelets.  The thought of making them feels stagnant after such a big life change.  However, making art is as vital as exhaling for me, and lately that energy has been flowing into watercoloring.

Even though I had to find all the pieces on my own, and I’m still finding them, and processing how to make all the pieces fit, the reason why it hurts so bad is because I love my parents, they’re a big part of me, and as I put my whole self back together, I’m not complete without them, too.

They might not ever fully understand, but they’re trying.  They still say…

prop•a•ga•tion:

The breeding of specimens of a plant or animal by natural processes from the parent.

The adoption agency told my parents that it was important to teach me about my culture and where I was from.  My parents took me to some sort of Korean culture event once or twice when I was little but told me I wasn’t interested…

 “Get them while they’re young,” is what they say and how they think. Nothing is more cruel than this ideology. It is as guilty as shooting someone unarmed - it is robbing someone of the purest part of their soul when they are most defenseless. As if by taking us as babies they will take our past, genetics, curiosity, emotions, voice, and soul. As if by taking us as babies…

How am I paying for this place - with plenty of shame and guilt.  Yet, I am appreciative of it, too.  I appreciate running water, the ability to bathe, a refrigerator, ample space to cook, the ability and ease to keep things tidy, no mice, a flushing toilet I don’t have to empty, and I did indulge in some nice bedding, a good yoga mat, and an extra long desk to work at where the wind, sun, and bugs can’t slow me down.  I also have one extra chair for a guest.  The thing I am most grateful for are…

Empathy is the glue that binds me to hope. Without it, I become undone. These last few months I’ve almost lost it. And have found without it, my light goes completely out - making it impossible to find my way. I had a taste of what it’s like to be on the side of all I’ve been fighting against. And I’ve found that there are two ways to handle unfathomable…