Don’t Make it about You
It’s important not to take it personally if the person you are trying to support does not respond or accept your help. It probably has nothing to do with you. It could be that being nice was a tactic that their abuser used to reel them back in. It could be that they feel safer handling difficult situations alone due to past experiences. They might not even be aware that asking for help is difficult because it is linked to their trauma. It could be anything. The most important thing you can do then is to stay calm and not make it about you. It’s not about being the rescuer and being the one to make them “better”…it’s about letting them know people love them for exactly who they already are.
Check in, follow up, and if they’re not opening up to you and you’re still concerned, maybe you can get a mutual friend you know they trust and who is stable to check in on them…then give them the space they need. Your job isn’t to “fix” them or save them - it’s to let them know they have people who are safe to go to, who care about them, and know how important their life is.
“The more healthy relationships a child has, the more likely he will be to recover from trauma and thrive. Relationships are the agents of change and the most powerful therapy is human love.”
Bruce D. Perry
#nationalsuicidepreventionmonth #bethe1to
Check in, follow up, and if they’re not opening up to you and you’re still concerned, maybe you can get a mutual friend you know they trust and who is stable to check in on them…then give them the space they need. Your job isn’t to “fix” them or save them - it’s to let them know they have people who are safe to go to, who care about them, and know how important their life is.
“The more healthy relationships a child has, the more likely he will be to recover from trauma and thrive. Relationships are the agents of change and the most powerful therapy is human love.”
Bruce D. Perry
#nationalsuicidepreventionmonth #bethe1to