Home is where your spirit is.

I don’t know when my heart claimed here as home, but the moment I felt it was when it was the first place I craved when my reality fell apart.  When my heart broke into a million pieces, and I lost my mind, and couldn’t even trust myself.  It wasn’t necessarily where I put my self back together, but it was the place that comforted me, let me rest, let me fall apart freely, where my shattered pieces weren’t able to harm anyone else, and showed me how nature works in mysterious ways, by holding up the purest mirror for me to look into, and from it I saw the thirsty land with all it’s thriving life, the little singing birds turning cactus into homes, the rich green leaves born out of the malnourished ground still reaching toward the sun, the vast empty space that continues to flourish through continuous seasons of drought and storms; it was through this reflection, the earth let me know I was going to be okay. 

In a time that could’ve left me feeling completely alone, I wasn’t alone; I looked out and found I had nature and billions of years of evolution behind me, inside me, and on my side - fighting with me for my survival - pushing me to grow.  And when the sun set that first night home, the desert laid in the darkness with me, all the while shining an infinite amount of tiny little lights, leading me through the night, heavy with darkness, yet still light enough to see what was right in front of me, guiding me star by star, into the midst of a glorious sunrise, in celebration of making it to a brand new day.

January 17, 2021 Joshua Tree